How Counselling helps

professional experienced counselling with Debbie Kelly MSc 07590 572866

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Category: Relating

  1. About Counselling and the Menopause

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    Whilst menopause is a totally natural life transition it can be a difficult time for many women

    Falling Autumn Leaves

    The physical changes and symptoms can be pervasive and disruptive. So often the timing is significant as it can coincide with the children growing up and possibly flying the nest so an element of re-evaluation of life, roles and routine can be mixed up with this change. For some the combination of their own hormonal changes can clash with teenage daughters or occur at times of heightened stress levels such as exam time when home life is already particularly fraught.

    Menopause signals the end of fertility, which can be a relief for some women if their periods have been problematic and for others it may herald more relaxed intimate relationships. However, even when a woman has thought her family complete, having the choice of further children removed can be unsettling and create difficult feelings around what it means to be a woman now that child -bearing is no longer a possibility. Early menopause brings its own set of issues as it can eliminate the chance of having further or any children and there may be additional illnesses associated with this early onset.

    The side-effects and symptoms of going through the menopause (being peri-menopausal) can have negative effects on health and well-being and relationships can also suffer. Many women have broken sleep with a knock-on effect for the partner and feeling tired and run down can heighten emotions and make life more difficult to cope with. Women can feel anxious, irritable, tired, and experience mood swings. Menopause can often cause a magnification of pre-existing problems and issues as energy is depleted, affecting coping mechanisms. There can be changes to sexual desire with some women experiencing physical symptoms that make sex painful or uncomfortable. Self-esteem can suffer, with the effects of medication, lack of sleep and thinning hair causing negative self -image.

    Fortunately, most symptoms can be overcome with medical or alternative therapies and there is a wide range of help available. However, even today, the menopause can be a difficult topic to raise and there may also be an expectation from Health Care Professionals that you just have to ‘get through it’.

    Alongside any medical help you access, counselling can assist by providing a non-judgmental environment in which to discuss and explore the difficult emotions that may be connected with the menopause. Some couples may also benefit from couples therapy at this time, which provides a platform from which to discuss the changes they are experiencing.

    Debbie Kelly MSc is an experienced counsellor working in Basingstoke in North Hampshire.  She sees clients experiencing life challenges concerning anxiety, depression, work stress, grief and bereavement, relationship difficulties and miscarriage/pregnancy loss.  

    Contact Debbie on 07590 572866 or email to arrange a free 30 minute introductory session.

  2. About Counselling and Grief and Bereavement

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    Grief and Bereavement Counselling in Basingtoke and Alton HampshireGrieving is a normal response to loss, whether it is loss of a loved one, loss of health, loss of a job or divorce.

    As a society however, we find it difficult to talk about death, dying and loss, which can make loss a silent and isolating experience. This can make the passage of grieving difficult, as it is human nature to want to tell our story, allowing us to incorporate our experience into our lives and continue our journey.

    It may be hard for family and friends to hear your story as they do not want you to be in pain and they may also be dealing with their own emotions. The passage of time can bring certain preconceptions that the grieving process should have ended. However, anniversaries, birthdays and family occasions can heighten our sense of loss and re-trigger the grieving process. It can seem as though family and friends have 'moved on' and expect the same from you.

    Counselling allows you the time and space to tell your story and be heard, to have someone alongside you who can bear your pain and is present for you alone. As a person-centred counsellor I will be independent from your experience but will not be distanced from you.

    I recognise the need for you to fully experience your grief by offering a safe and contained place for the exploration of all of your emotions, without judgment or preconceptions.

    The process of telling your story allows your loss to become integrated into your every day life, and for your loved one to be remembered and to remain part of your life, without the pain of your loss being unbearable.

     

    Please visit my links page for further details of online support and information.

    Debbie Kelly MSc is an experienced counsellor working in Basingstoke in North Hampshire.  She sees clients experiencing life challenges concerning anxiety, depression, work stress, grief and bereavement, relationship difficulties and miscarriage/pregnancy loss. 

    Contact Debbie on 07590 572866 or email to arrange a free 30 minute introductory session.